I chanced upon this thread about this girl who had sex with a guy who is attached..



I have so much to say to her. To all people out there, even if u lose your virginity, don't give up loving yourself, build back your confidence, don't waste time crying over it, those time is needed for development and self-improvement. Cheers:)

Here is my reply to her.



I saw this thread about being friends with someone for so long but realise the right person is right before you just that you took so long to know it. Life is so unpredictable, you think he should stay as friends with you, but who knows you realise later he is suitable for you.




Life is full of regrets, but we must know how to turn things back to what we are happy with.

Don't cry over spilled milk, it maybe a simple and overused sentence, but it really means alot to me. Don't let the circumstances change our emotions or thinking, instead we should look ahead about how we are going to handle the circumstances and not let them control us.

Whatever is over is over, no point crying over it or make any regrets. Take those mourning time or crying time to improve yourself.
Self confidence
Self esteem
and mostly Loving yourself.
People only love you if you love yourself:)

Start loving yourself today!

0 comments

jastubee =)) 11:05 AM.

I am addicted to my new hobby, playing my guitar! Yesterday I managed to play 2 old songs

1. Stand by Me
2. Robbie Williams- Better Man

These songs are easier to play, I tried Michelle Branch's songs, I almost killed my fingers and my brain. These are my weakness.

1. Unable to change chords that fast during the song.
2. Do not know what kind of strumming rhythm I should play for different songs.
3. My singing pause awhile because I was thinking of how to press the chord damn

All credits to Hui Ying, she helped me think of a new guitar name, not HHD, headless or corrola. The origin of my guitar name.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 1:43 PM.

Today I will name this day Happy Hobby Day! 29th March is Happy Hobby Day.

What to do on HHD?
1. Find a NEW hobby
2. Search in Wikipedia your new hobby and learn more about its history and information about your hobby.
3. Spend at least 2 hours on your new hobby
4. Tell your good friends about your new hobby
5. Talk to your hobby:)

To me, hobbies are practised for interest and enjoyment, rather than financial reward. It is the main factor for us people to be happy, time spent on hobby is not wasted time, it is invested time.

Engaging in a hobby can lead to acquiring substantial skill, knowledge, and experience. However, personal fulfillment is the aim. The sense of that fulfillment just makes you want to commit more into your hobby, you feel youthful and young at heart.

Jasmine's hobby generation
Primary: Collecting Stickers and Stamps
Secondary: Listening to the music, dancing and singing, playing a little guitar, rollerblading and swimming.
JC: damn wasted life I think...erm Listening to the music and MUGGING? wtf
HHD 2007: Walking and playing my guitar!

My parents bought this guitar when I was Secondary 2 for about $200 plus. It is an acoustic guitar. I went for a six week course for guitar, but still do not know how to play songs with the guitar that well.




My guitar hobby made a comeback! What names should I give to my guitar? Hm...
1. Headless (my gutiar only has a neck and a body)
2. HHD (happy hobby day)
3. Corrola (Papa's car)



My old guitar books from kinokuniya.


2 picks and 1 tuner


Pretending to play..urgh


Any guitar player who is willing to teach me for FREE??

0 comments

jastubee =)) 1:47 PM.

I am physically and emotionally drained. I slept at 4.30am because I was talking on the phone with a friend about alot of things that had happened. The next morning I had to wake up about 9am to volunteer at the Chi Huai Hospice Centre.

I tried to get up at 9am, but my head just fell back on my pillow. I set the buzzer on my handphone immediately and went to sleep. BZzzzzzz, I tried to sit up straight on my bed but just couldn't feel the strength to get out of the bed. I fell back on my bed again. I repeated theses actions about 5 times until 10am.

I was physically tired maybe because
1. Didn't sleep enough
2. Emotionally drained

I realise things didn't go out smoothly as I thought, it always happen this way. I realise it is a trend.

First, you click so well with a friend, but after a few weeks, the friendship just seem impossible. Are these friends that I met these years called seasoned friends, who are people who come into your life for a short term?

This year I have many short-lived friends, but I was glad that I have met them. There are many different types of people, one day I would like to categorise them, because their personalities can even be similar to other people whom I know.

And there is 1 major problem that is freaking draining me. Why is it that everytime I faced a crisis, I can't think of a solution on the spot?

I have to think alone and emo alone for a while on what is the best approach to handle the situation.

Is like when you think you should not hang out with those people, but after thinking you will realise you are being selfish, these people are fun people to be with, why magnify the problems and break the friendship?

Jasmine you are a selfish pig.

It is good to reflect my actions everyday(my hobby), but after reflecting I will have regrets on what I just did and will try resolve the situation. This kind of lagged thinking can kill my brain cells.

Damnit. I am so freaking imperfect.

Look at the trying-to-lag me.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 5:17 PM.

http://forums.hardwarezone.com/showthread.php?p=22929365#post22929365
http://forums.hardwarezone.com/showthread.php?t=1569572
Who posted this shit? Is a bo liao once a good friend of mine. Well I shall not throw vulgarities inside here because I have already complained to everybody who knows me.

I am not saddened or disappointed or angry about what I saw in the post, well like what my close friends said, just laughed at his bo liao doings and his ignorance. I knew he was facing some psychological problem because he likes to inflict pain on people emotionally. Well, as a friend I don't hate him, I pity him.

Thank you my friend for being there for me last time, I like the necklace you gave me on Valentine's day. I wear it every time I went out with my friends. The days with you and Eugene were fun, but now it seems that we are drifting apart. There is a reason to it and I will accept it.

Everybody shows his/her true colours, and I believe that true colours from people are the factors whether other people like it anot. When you love somebody, is loving the person for who he is= loving his true colours. Every guys' true colours I see just turn me off, will there be a guy whose true colours appeal to me?

Many young people make the mistake of giving up their late adolescence and early adulthood, which is a time of discovery and experimentation, to be committed to someone they might eventually outgrow. That is why I know that I am not emotionally ready or mature enough to strike a balance with work, relationship and studies. It is the best time to see guys' true colours and know them better. If there are potential ones out there, the guys are willing to wait for you.

I want to be a separate individual experimenting and learning to grow at this stage of my life.

1 comments

jastubee =)) 4:04 PM.

I slept at 4am today and woke up at 8.45am(morning call). I felt so sleepy, I bathed and went for a "job interview" at Jurong East. It is a watch promoter job, but they only need to recruit 2 people for the watch showcase. All you have to do is just stand there wearing mini skirt and tank top during the 8 days showcase. Pay? It is an unbelievable $12 per hour!

I knew I am not going to be selected, the watch company wants extremely sweet, pretty and tall girls. After the "job interview", I went to find Shi Yun, Jun Jie, Isaac and Tian Shun at Katib mrt station. Shi yun and I waited so long for the guys. Isaac and Tian Shun cycle from Seng Kang to Katib, what great staminas they have.
At Katib MacDonalds



Each one of us has a bike and we cycled from Katib to Sembawang Park. I am seriously a coward. Why?
1. I don't dare cycle down stairs.
2. I don't dare cycle on the pedestrain crossing even if there are no cars, I only cycle when the red man turns green. (am I not alone? anybody else like me also?)
3. I don't dare make sharp turns.
4. I can't cycle uphill slopes, my leg power sucks and my changing of gear sucks. (major problem)

But I think being a girl, I was proud of my overall cycling trip today.
1. I was able to tahan throughout the whole journey back and forth from Katib to Sembawang.
2. I like cycling down slopes, felt so shiok and refreshing.
3. I like to practise changing the gears of the bike when I met up with different terrains. (makes me think when I cycle) --> I like to think:)
4. I did not fall today which I was afraid I might before the cycling trip.

We had some fun at the playground after Shi Yun left. The guys were really fun to play with, they may seem mischievious and immature(heh heh) but I knew they still care about how I felt during cycling.

Actually I didn't want to cycle anymore after Shi Yun left, I was too tired. But because of me, they had to change their original plans and they said I bangseh them. So after much thinking, I told myself not to be selfish and I was given the strength to smile and cycle again. I felt a burst of energy thus I had even more fun during the late evening. Here are some videos of the kiddy guys:)



Thanks Shi Yun for accompanying me and showing how WOMAN you are, I am proud of you!
Thanks Jun Jie for your suans and sense of humour, or else the whole day might be boring.
Thanks Tian Shun for instructing me how to cycle and helped me check out for hazards.
Lastly, Isaac! So sad, you always had to tag behind me to "protect" me, I always cycle so slow but lucky you were always there to watch out for any hazards for me and taught me how to change gear. Thanks for the "traditional ride" to Katib Mrt Station. I weighed 45kg but I think you felt I was 60kg bah. HAha.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 11:39 PM.

Failure is a sin, it plagues all of us but failure is not fatal.

God is already prepared for our failures, he has the way.
Revelation 13:8
All inhabitants of the earth will worship the beast—all whose names have not been written in the book of life belonging to the Lamb that was slain from the creation of the world.

God uses failure as a platform for our glory.
Righteousness- Besides right standing with God, you are also conform to the standard of God

In school, if you want to do well in the subject, you must believe God's intelligence on the subject. God's standard is in us. He gives us intelligence, we must make use of our intelligence, exercise it, apply it, use it and believe it.

Failure and emotions are the seed bed for change

Even if we did poorly for exams, we must still remember God's standard in us. We were never failures in christ. Don't take the failure in our life for the position in Christ.

Usually when we face constant failures, we devalue ourselves. But we must know that we have the wisdom of God, we need to keep perserving.

When sin(failures) abounds, Grace and God's favour super abounds in us. God always turn our failure for good. We don't have to be afraid of failures.

How we handle our failures determines how successful we are, we can only be successful when we have failures

Don't let the ugly and sad situation of ours makes us think lesser of ourselves. See failures as the breeding ground for God's super abounding favour. Be conscious of God and his favour and not our failures.

When we fall, God don't beat us, He feeds us like a baby and the baby is encouraged to walk again. Baby don't know what is the meaning of fear or maybe what the hell is fear, that is why babies dare to stand up again, some of us are 19 years old, yet we still don't dare to stand up when we fall because we are scared to fall again.

When we gave ourselves up to God, self efforts ceased and favour of God sets in.

Letting go is a frightening feeling, is just like Trustfall, if you played Trustfall in camps, then you will know what I mean. Briefly, Trustfall is a game whereby a person is on a high platform and falls backwards hoping his friends will catch his fall.

Well you dare to let go, means fall when you know you will be safe when you fall backwards, God promises to be there for you when you fall, it 100% safe and secure. He is always there for you when you fall. I remember in my secondary school camp, this fat girl fell backwards and because she is heavy and fat, her friends couldn't catch her, she landed on the ground, pipohpipohpipoh.

In Luke Chapter 5 story
Invite Jesus into our boat, when we realise at the spot we want to fish has no fish, ask Jesus about it instead of finding another spot to fish, he will say "Go back to the same spot and you will receive abundance", indeed you find more fish than ever before.

4 comments

jastubee =)) 12:09 AM.

Yi Ling, Le Duan and I decided to stay overnight at Yi Ling's House because we decided not to spend money on outings!

I got a freaking mild food poisoning on the first night while playing Mahjiong, blame it on the soggy "crispy" KFC chicken breast and wings.

My 2 cousins are 10 times more camwhores than me, I realise camwhoring needs skill. I can't get my position right in the photos if I must take my picture with a camera.

Firstly it is tiring for you to stretch your arm outwards and twist your hand with the camera facing yourself. And when you press on that tiny button to shoot to complete camwhore picture 1, you realise your tired hand shakes too much until the picture turns out like "shutter".

Well they helped me style a cute hairstyle. Here is the undetailed sequence.




I can't sleep for the first night, there were air con and blasted radio in the room. I am used to saving electricity, I don't even use a fan, I just opened my windows, air is free anyway, but wind comes by once in a while.

So with the extra unnatural cold air and Class 95Fm in the enclosed room, I am not used to it, so I did not sleep until I heard Yi Ling's mother woke up to do morning housework! I don't know what was the time, but I believe it was after 4 to 5am. So I immediately forced myself to sleep. I freaking can't sleep because I was too embarassed over "thinking too much" and yeah, normal for me to sleep late too.

The next day we watched cannot make it Channel 8 drama show at 9pm. I was laughing at how the plot and the actors were so exaggerated and misleading. Well only children believes the media. We played mahjiong while camwhoring, don't ask me how we do it, it is possible.

We went to do facial mask at 2am! I can feel the heat on my face, I was whining, "ah, so hot!! My skin is tearing!" All of us do look like ghosts, have you seen bibotic and vain ghosts? Well, I know how those type of ghost looks like now. The mask is a blue gel that you need to apply on your face, after 20 minutes, peel the mask slowly from the side of your face. Haha so cool! By the way you can get it at Watson for $1.95.


Damn, a few strands of hair on my forehead were stuck in the harden mask, I took quite a while to watch those strands clean. I feel so refreshed after applying toner on to my face, feels like FREE spa.

More photos to be uploaded. My handphone is not good for camwhoring, so I need to get the pictures from my cousins.

I had bimbo fun with them. When is the next time we can sleep together again!?!

0 comments

jastubee =)) 12:20 PM.

Wanna puke and wanna rest...
PUKEEEEEE...
I am proud of not being impure, too pure=innocent=ignorant=stupid
too much problems and sins in my body, I am ill now.

I want to run away from reality, I don't want history to repeat itself.

www.celeste-chen.blogspot.com
Check her out, I guess she has already F****ed, 16 years old and have numerous boyfriends, I look way more decent and less bitchy than her but had only fallen in love once and never again.

I must prevent myself, now I said never to fall in love, but probably when I am ready I will shout, "Come and Get me!"

Damn...Going to Campus Ministry on Saturday, but I will see devil couples there, how I wish I can change church and avoid seeing them. But who don't they change church instead? Went church-hopping, hard to settle in a new one.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 11:44 PM.

Japanese can be open-minded yet crazy at the same time. I laughed at all the videos until I cried, fell off from my chair and bit my hand. Enjoy:)











This is the funniest to me, keep the best to the last. Look at the passenger's expression. He made me ROFL.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 11:39 PM.

-- what is love ? --

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing and is your voice caught within
your chest??
-it isn`t love, it`s like.

You can`t keep your eyes or hands off of them, am I right??
-it isn`t love, it`s lust.

Are you proud, and eager to show them off?
- it isn`t love, it`s pride.

Do you want them because you know they`re there??
-it isn`t love, it`s loneliness.

Are you there because it`s what everyone wants??
-it isn`t love, it`s loyalty.

Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand??
-it isn`t love, it`s low confidence.

Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don`t want to hurt
them??
-it isn`t love, it`s pity.

Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip a beat??
-it isn`t love, it`s infatuation.

Do you pardon their faults because you care about them??
-it isn`t love, it`s friendship.

Do you tell them every day that they are the only one you think of??
-it isn`t love, it`s a lie.

Are you willing to give all of your favorite things for their sake??
-it isn`t love, it`s charity.


So what is L o v e ?

Does your heart ache and break when they`re sad??
-then it`s l o v e.

Do you cry for their pain, even when they`re strong??
-then it`s l o v e.

Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts??
-then it`s l o v e.

Do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and
relation pulls you close and holds you there??
-then it`s l o v e.

Do you accept their faults because they`re a part of who they are??
-then it`s l o v e.

Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regret??
-then it`s l o v e.

Would you give them your heart, your life, your death??

0 comments

jastubee =)) 2:28 PM.

Am I contradicting myself? I have faith in Jesus but suddenly I like death metal and heavy black metal. Such as Emperor or Deicide or Mudvayne. I feel quite high after hearing the music, I like the screaming part and the growling part, makes me feel happy and headache at the same time.

I did not know these bands are devil worshippers. I just like the music.


Pop music sucks now, I only like certain kind of pop. Backside Boys or Eastlife, you suck!
My friend introduced to me metal music, haha, I really felt like a frog in a well. Didn't know that metal music appeals to me more. But why most Metal Bands have anti-chirst beliefs?

1. Thrash Metal: Megadeth-Symphony of Destruction & Metallica-One
"The genre's sound was much more aggressive, louder and faster than the original metal bands or their glam metal contemporaries, and the guitar work was often more technically complex", wikipedia

Megadeth- Due to the bands' perceived anti-Christian beliefs, which in turn caused the two bands to cancel their appearances.


2. Death Metal: Opeth-The Grand Conjuration, Deicide-Homage for Satan, Deicide- Kill the Christians


"The vocals are often grunts, snarls, and low gurgles colloquially called death grunts or death growls. Death grunts require use of the throat and guts, unlike traditional singing techniques which discourage this technique. Some people consider it an overtone style of singing. Music journalist Chad Bowar notes that, because of the similarity of the vocals to those of the Sesame Street character, the style is sometimes called "Cookie Monster vocals".", wikipedia



3. Heavy Black Metal: Emperor-The Loss And Curse Of Reverence
Another song by Emperor.

The audience are like possessed!

"The genre is characterized by an aggressive and abrasive sound, coupled with a dark atmosphere that rejects Right Hand Path sentiments", wikipedia



4. Power Metal which is closely related to progressive metal: Dream Theater-Learning To Live
"The high level of musical proficiency is often combined with a lyrical counterpart in the form of epic textual concepts, resulting in lengthy songs and concept albums. Progressive metal is rarely heard on mainstream radio and video programs, much due to that the length of the songs are not suited for those media", wikipedia



5. Doom Metal: My Dying Bride- The Cry of Mankind


"Doom metal is slow, heavy, and rife with pessimism, evoking an atmosphere of darkness, despair and misery", wikipedia



6. Glam Metal: Poison - Something to Believe In
"Glam metal has hedonistic lyrics, often focuses on sex, alcohol, and drugs, and many of the first wave bands had songs pertaining to the occult.", wikipedia



7. Nu Metal: Linkin Park
"It typically fuses influences from the grunge and alternative metal, electronic music and other metal genres, most often thrash metal and groove metal., wikipedia



8. Alternative Rock: Placebo-Bitter End, Nirvana-Smells Like Teen Spirit

Placebo is make up of 1 gay 1 bisexual and 1 straight guy. HAHA what a cute band.
brian molko(lead singer)=bisexual, in a relationship, with a child.
stefan osdal(bass)=openly gay
steve hewitt(drummer)=straight, in a realtionship, with a child.



9. Shock Rock: Marilyn Manson
Shock rock is a very wide umbrella term for artists who combine rock music with elements of theatrical shock value in live performance.



10. Expressive Rock: Placebo- Hexagram




11. Groove Metal: Exhorder- Anal Last
"Groove metal is a blend of several genres from the '80s, including traditional heavy metal, hardcore punk, and thrash metal", wikipedia



12. Classic Metal: Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin
"Classic metal bands are typically characterized by thumping fast basslines, not so fast, heavy but "clean", riffs, extended lead guitar solos, high pitched vocals and anthemic choruses", wikipedia



13. New Wave of British Heavy Metal: Venom- Countess Bathory
The New Wave of British Heavy Metal (frequently abbreviated as NWOBHM or N.W.O.B.H.M.) emerged in the late 1970s, in the United Kingdom, as a reaction in part to the decline of traditional heavy metal bands such as Led Zeppelin, Deep Purple and Black Sabbath.



14. Hard Rock: Queen- Bohemian Rhapsody



There are more rock genres like Instrumental Rock, Post rock, Math Rock, Psychedelic rock, Folk rock, Garage Rock, Art Rock, Space Rock and more.

*Pants* Did alot of research, I am going to wiki metal and rock everyday!

0 comments

jastubee =)) 6:49 PM.

Now guys do not want virgins to be their girlfriends, because
1. They don't want to have sex with their inexperienced girlfriends who will be struggling like dead fishes on the bed.
2. Those girlfriends who gave their virginity away to the guys will start being clingy to the guys.

Girls should have this mindset that they should give in to sex with no hard feelings. Go and ask the men from the age 25 to 35 years old, they have countless sex with countless girlfriends.

What has this era changed to? A premarital sex community? It is dumb or naive for girls to think that they should only make love with their husband.

I believe that there is 50-50 for premarital sex and anti-premarital sex communities in this world. But now premarital sex is getting common since the age of 18, it may be a shame when you tell your husband that you are still a virgin. Virginity is nothing now for women, since guys do not have virginity, women should not have too. Chastity no longer holds its importance nowadays.

Making love and having sex is different. Making love is common because guys have sex with their loved ones and it is pleasurable and beautiful. But just having sex is not that common because guys do not want to have sex with unwilling partners, it feels so fake and tiring.

Are you still a virgin now?

0 comments

jastubee =)) 12:29 PM.

Have you heard of the Law of Attraction? Is like do you know why you may be involved in a car accident? It is the Law of Attraction. You emit out negative quantums that makes that particular car to hit you. Have you seen familiar faces before in the mrt train? It is all because of the Law of Attraction.

Law of Attraction is a mixutre of Physics and Psychology, what a cute Law. There is a reason why we will meet up or even like somebody, it is the quantums we send out that will attract the person to meet up or even like us.

Turn on your speakers and listen until the end, it is really interesting.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=csiAsbPxmmY

I told my church friends about this and he said, "Have you heard of the Law of Grace?" I realise Science and Religion there are smililarities and differences, that makes everything in this world interesting.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 8:46 PM.

Today I have finished all the modules and I am left with revision. But I realise I am absent-minded, I can't remember how to do vertical parking, parallel parking or directional change. I got mixed up with everything.

I think I must write down or take down somewhere about things that I should memorise and remember. I always forget my car no. to the extend that I can even forget familiar faces. So my instructor jokingly said, "You will never find your car one day if you park your car at Suntec City and by the way do you remember that I have thought you a few lessons before? HAHAHA!!"

Vertical Parking (algin car near to the right)
1. Check right side mirror and right blindspot.
2. Signal left and reverse.
3. Sit straight and turn head to the back to see whether the right pole is reaching the corner of the demister.
4. Stop the car and look at the right side mirror and right blindspot.
5. When the top corner of the demister covers the pole, full locked left.
6. When the pole reappears, turn 1 round right.
7. When the top corner of the demister covers the pole again, full locked left.
8. Look at the right side mirror and when the car is parallel to the poles, turn 2 rounds to the right.
9. Look over your left shoulder and when the 2nd pole is in line with my shoulder, stop the car, put neutral gear and handbrake.
10. Signal left and full lock left when the left door is in line with the first pole.

Parallel Parking (align car in the middle)
1. Check right side mirror and right blindspot.
2. Signal left and reverse.
3. Sit straight and turn head to the back to see whether the right pole is reaching the corner of the demister.
4. Stop the car and look at the right side mirror and right blindspot.
5. When the top corner of the demister covers the pole, full locked left.
6. Look at the right side mirror, if pole B is seen totally, turn 2 rounds to the right and reverse.
7. Look at the Hondo City logo at the corner of the windscreen, when the pole A touches it, full locked right while reversing.
8. When the gap between the pole B and the car is big, full locked right when the pole A just reach Hondo City Logo, but if the gap between the pole B and the car is small, full locked right when pole A just reach after 1 and a half Hondo Logo.
9. Look over left shoulder and stop reversing when the back of the car is close to the back poles.
10. Turn 2 round to the left when moving forward to the poles infront.
11. Reverse to the centre, neutral gear and handbrake.
12. Move to the front again.
13. Reverse with 1 round to the left until back of the car is close to the back poles.
14. Signal right and check blindspot before full locking to the right. When Pole A reaches the corner of the windscreen, full lock left to the centre of the lane.

Directional Change
1. Check all blindspot and reverse.
2. Look over right shoulder to check when the curb is in line with the triangle window, turn 1 round to the right.
3. When the curb is in line with the centre of the back right door, full locked right.
4. Reverse and look behind and all blindspot.
5. When car is parallel in lot, return 2 rounds to the left and reverse.
6. Stop when the side mirror covers the curb.

yeah, i can print this out now for revision.
Now I better go and Recce the places at Yio Chu Kang and memorise the 10 routes.

Driving is fun! Especially manual. I need to do extra work more than other people due to my absent-mindedness. In future when I go to work and wherever I go, I need to bring a note book with me.

I want a nice note book, portable and handy. Going to shop for it soon!

0 comments

jastubee =)) 4:38 PM.

I want to go to Mechanical Engineering, because I really want to keep myself occupied with interesting physics and maths. Really want to know how things work too! But learning this course for 4 years, is it worth it?

I read this interesting article, sorry I have been reading alot of articles about life and ambitions, I really love knowing about life.

"Don't scale every peak you come across. Or, to put it another way, look before you climb. Sometimes, the view from the top makes it all worthwhile. But on other occasions, you may regret wasting all the effort" Anna Murphy

It is like I am reaching my goal of being a mechanical engineer (a white collar one:)), but will I waste my time and effort escalating in this path? I decided to choose buiness tourism because I like tourism since young, I like to travel around the world, so I had many crazy and mixture of ideas in my head to make Singapore a more vibrant and interesting country to visit. Yeah easier said than done.

Your teacher and parents will tell you to climb every mountain to reach the summit, well sometimes and especially these days, there just isn't enought time to climb every mountain, so we need to be very careful about choosing the activities that we want to invest in.

I went to NTU open house in the morning, I like the friendly people and the ambience, feels like home. Saw alot of my friends too. I heard that Buiness tourism is very hard to get in, and in the first year, I will be learning basic Business, so I need to learn ECONOMICS! Ew...the reason why I dropped Economics was because I don't like it and don't like to write essays.

On the way to NUS open house, I thought I saw my ex-boyfriend, Ying Hui and Hui Ying told me it is not him LA, I think I have forgotten how he looks now, because his image just gets blurry and blurry nowadays. Haha, is a good thing.

After thinking, I think I will stick back to Mechanical Engineering. Which school? NTU, I think. NUS people so unfriendly and the open house is kind of a failure to me. I wanted to go NUS but the open house disappointed me. When I wanted to talk to students about some courses, they need to refer me to the professors, there are so many poeple talking to the professors, when will I get the chance to talk to them? NTU is better, there were so many NTU students to talk to, they know their courses well and was able to ask them personal and "stupid" questions like how is hostel life and what kind of projects they do?

Mechanical, mechanical...will you love me? Will I be able to soar as high as other girls who don't do engineering? Although there are valuable lessons to be learned from exposing myself to variety, the opportunity cost may be too high in that I have could be doing work that could far more important to my future happiness.

Being optimistic and dreaming big is one thing, but reaching beyond what is rationally possibe, within your financial means and within sensible time frames is a good recipe for making yourself miserable. I have to watch my path, I can't be too optimistic even when I know Jesus is my by side.

I don't want to climb the wrong mountain, Jesus guide me through. I could be pragmatic and tread my career path carefully and smoothly but I could rush around grasping greedily at everything, and not getting anywhere in the end.

3 comments

jastubee =)) 11:47 AM.

I like rock and screaming punk songs, one of my friends wants to be my music pal but I realise he only likes rock songs, I still like some pop songs like
1. Justin Timberlake- What goes around comes around
2. Nelly Furtado- Say It Right

Now I like these rock songs! I like screaming songs, as in the lead singer screamed the lyrics out, expecially at the chorus or bridge. The latest few I heard over the radio is:
1. Daughtry- It's not over
2. Red Jumpsuit Apparatus- Face Down (my favourite)
3. Red Jumpsuit Apparatus- False Pretense
4. My Chemical Romance- I Don't Love you

I need to find a hobby! I read an article that hobbies keep our minds sharp and our hearts youthful. They will be welcome distractions from the stresses of work so don't give up on hobbies!

When people asked me what is my hobby... I hesistated and said :walking
That walking is not really walking from esplanade to Bishan, it is a time of peace for me to reflect on my daily actions, observe people and think about life and God and also on how to improve myself daily.

Yeah I am thinking alot, but thinking makes me happy, so I think thinking which is the subset of walking will be my hobby.

I feel that I need a tangible hobby, thinking is a weird or maybe a unique hobby, haha. I feel like picking up my guitar again. But I want to play drum!!! I like songs that have loud playing of drums and beat like Red Jumpsuit Apparatus!

My friend said that he will teach me guitar, don't really know whether I should go and visit him to learn my guitar even though I really hope I can play my guitar and sing and record it in YOU TUBE! I admire some people who are able to play a guitar and sing at the same time. There are 2 famous people in YOU TUBE.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kw1rCH0v6Dw


I wrote my own lyrics before but without playing a guitar, I was just singing it out with my own tune, haiz, really need a music pal, preferrably a guitarist!

0 comments

jastubee =)) 11:27 AM.

I almost shocked my mother to death.

When I came back home from church late at night, I wanted to give my parents a surprise. I was hiding behind my brother while he opened the master bedroom's door, my brother was talking to my parents about something, it was very dark, I crawled to my parents' bed and shout, "Boo"!

My parents both screamed, my mother screamed very loudly until she went totally silent. My brother and I immediately laughed on the way out. I decided to go back into the room to apologise because I felt bad.

When I opened the door, my father was shaking my mother on the bed, she was lying motionless on the bed, he kept calling my mother's name, I called my brother (specialise in first aid), she did not respond to us. All of were shaking, I stopped shaking her and broke down, I have not cried for a long time.

I thought my mum was dead (so foolish of me), I thought I caused my mother's death. I immediately prayed to God to revive her, I want my mama back. Her face was pale and she did not respond at all. My brother checked her pulse and said, "I checked twice, she is not breathing papa, I go call 995!" I continued praying while crying. My father was shouting, " You shocked mummy, do you know that people can get shocked to death!"

It was a miracle, my mother opened her eyes a little and started to breathe very deeply and loudly. I cried to thank God for the miracle. I grabbed her hands and apologised.

It was just my experience today, I never want to shock anybody else in future no matter how young or strong, it was a lesson learnt. I thought I would not be able to say "I love you" before I lose her. sob..

After reflecting, I realise my mother really mean alot to me, my papa too, my brother too. Just imagine seeing them not breathing, it really hurts. My brother said that a person can don't breathe for 4 mins, but after that is in danger zone.

I went to church happily with these faces.




I was crying very badly on my bed after my mum was revive.
This will be the ugliest picture I ever had, I did not know my still photo of my crying face is so ugly. Girls don't cry infront of guys!


My brother just told me my mother did not fainted, because if someone faints (like me), we will still be breathing.
My mother went unconscious, that is why she did not breathe, if she still continues not breathing for another 4 mins, more than that she is brain dead.

Thanks God for the miracle, when I started calling out your name I saw my mother's eyelids moving. Praise the lord.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 11:53 PM.

I went out with my old guy friend yesterday to Kinokuniya, we were looking at engineering books, he is a poly student majoring on electrical engineering, but he is so pro and hardworking that in his second year poly and NTU wants him. I am so inspired by how he is inspired by physics.

So I decided to check out Kinokuniya because he often goes there to read biblographies of famous people, physics, maths and engineering. I am really interested in Mechanical Engineering, I like the physics and the maths. There is also mechanical design, you can design your own handphone, camera, machine and more.

My parents discouraged me to try mechanical engineering for univerisity, my father said that people would rather employ man than woman and mechanical engineering is phasing out because Singapore is heading to using more machines and computer programming than using people. He said I have to suffer for 1 to 2 years after getting my bachelor degree for mechanical engineering while doing MBA part-time, because I have to work as an engineer in a industry. It will be sweaty, tiring and tedious. I will be working in a dirty environment and I have to carry heavy machines or turbines.

He suggested to me choosing what girls choose. Hey I am not that 100% girl, I like doing what man do too. These are my likes:
1. hands-on activities
2. lead a group of people to do a project
3. keep myself occupied with mathematical and physcial problems
4. want to know how things work and how it is set up
5. Best woman engineer in the world *(crapped it out:P)

Parents say mechanical engineering has little job prospects and it will be tough for me, they suggest business, many girls take up that course and they can wear so smart and put on make up...

Should I go for interest or logic in Singapore? Get an easy course and easy job to earn a stable income? or take up the challenge to puruse my interest that may end up no where?

0 comments

jastubee =)) 4:18 PM.

Hooray! I have just finished stage 1/4 of my manual autocar driving lessons! I stalled the engine fewer times and was able to change up and down the gear and turning bends.

Weakness: Braking and blindspot!

A) When changing lane to the right
1. Look rear mirror and right side mirror, signal adn check blindspot. Accelerate with the steering wheel turn slightly to the right.

MSBA! Mirror, signal, blindspot and accelerate!


B) When moving off from uphill slope, there are 2 ways to prevent vehicle from rolling backwards.
1. Apply handbreak, get biting point and release handbreak, off you go!
or
2. Apply foot break, get half-clutch, immediately tap onto accelerator pedal.


C) When turning round a bend.
1. When 1st gear, use half-clutch and turn steering wheel, acclerate when 3/4 of the bend.
2. When 3rd gear, break and clutch to change to 2nd gear with the brake still on, release both clutch gradually and brake pedal and turn, accelerate when 3/4 of the bend.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 5:07 PM.

Rascal Flatts- What hurts the most
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do






Nelly Furatado- Say It Right
Oh you don't mean nothing at all to me
No you don't mean nothing at all to me
But you got what it takes to set me free
Oh you could mean everything to me




Nickelback- If everyone cared
If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died



Red Jumpsuit Apparatus- Face Down
Do you feel like a man when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.

Face down in the dirt, she said,
"This doesn't hurt", she said,
"I finally had enough."
[x2]




Augustana-Boston
You don't know me, you don't even care, oh yeah,
She said
You don't know me, and you don't wear my chains... oh yeah,

0 comments

jastubee =)) 5:28 PM.

Hey I just finished lesson 11 of my driving lessons, haha I love driving manual cars now. You have to judge speed and terrain to know what kind of gears you have to engage.

I have 2 sessions on friday, in the 1st session, the malay instructor fell asleep quite a number of times. He wore sunglasses, but I still knew he doze off because his head was bobbing up and down. Suddenly his body will shake and he woke up from his sleep. I was W to the T to the F when I was driving at Yio Chu Kang Road. Hope he will get sacked soon.

Oh yah, when i was driving, I saw alot of cars and people surrounding an area infront of me, I saw a malay woman dressed in black lying motionless on the road, an umbrella was covering her body. I had to turn my car to the oncoming traffic lane to pass by the accident area. So freaky witnessing an accident. I think a black mercedes car hit her, because it was the nearest car next to her. Haha rich people are losers!!!

I cannot believe 2 of my classmates receive 4As and 3As respectively.

One is a bimbo and she always fail her exams, I always do better than her. That day she wore until so low cut and reveal her stomach, sexy but at the same time inappropriate for that kind of environment and atmosphere. I was What The..F when she went on stage.

Another guy whom I thought is going to repeat his JC went on stage for 3 distinctions. WTF WTF WTF. How the hell he masked all the way until prelims, he was the last in class for almost every exams. Hey this kind of people masked all the way and finally study so hard for A levels really is deceiving and evil. Watch out for fair and sleepy heads, they are MASKERS.

Ookok, you want to know my A level results. A bloody AAC and a C6 for GP. Damn that ASS, all his fault. Supposed to get an AAA and a B for my GP okie.
Maths - A
Chem - A
Physics - C
General Paper - C6

David lent me his gothic hat! Tadaa!


I told Mr Wan about my depression and told him I regretted being in a relationship, Mrs Chan was there and asked whether I am ok now. I said "I am really ok!" Hey My Wan is on my side! Haha. (Will not elaborate, muahaha)

Did not go to the beach because it was raining glory and grace on me! Praise the Lord that I still can get my 2 As, I thought I will screw my maths and my general paper. Went to arcade with sisters and played for 1 hour, some crazy guys were trying to grab my attention when I was talking to my cousin outside the arcade, they were talking to me and I ignored them, arcade guys are really daring and friendly but super immature.

Went to watch Hannibal rising with sisters until 11pm, the show is gory but the plot is nice. Never take revenge with your own hands, if you want to take revenge on someone, ask God to help you, He will do it for you in a nicer approach that will be happy and will not feel hurt or guilty. Well Lionel talked to me on the phone, well I told him I will never forgive some people in my life, it will not stay at bitterness or grudges, because God already gave me calmness when I stand beside them, I feel it is more than enough though I know He wants to give me more.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 11:12 PM.

2ml is the release of the A level results, I am still as calm and relax, am I emotionless? I cast all my worries to Jesus, so I am feeling as normal as any other day.

2ml I am having 2 driving lessons before the release of the A level results, I think I will drive normally and not get anxious or excited about what is going to happen later. I am so calm and heck care that I don't mind going very late to school to collect my results.

If I really did badly for my results, I will want to swear at that somebody, I will not bash him up but just release my anger at him. He is definitely the cause of my poor results. I have thought this through, he was the one who threw into depression, if only I have believed in Jesus earlier, I won't even fall into depression.

If I did well, (probability is 10%), I will want to celebrate, eat crab and prawns.

After collecting my results, I want to go to the beach to relax, smell the air and feel the sand. Only sad or emo people will go there. I know my results can never be a good one, so I will still go to the beach. I am not going to walk into the sea like what drama shows do, not going to scream like what drama shows do too and not going to run like what korean drama shows do, I will just lie down on the sand and relax and pray to Jesus that he will prepare something good for me in the future.

0 comments

jastubee =)) 10:48 PM.